Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Haute Topics


Okay, sorry about the no postage yesterday. I'm actually held up in a white room sorting out blueprints. A friend from Queen's, Stacey, is down the hall running the auditions for Shaw that are STILL ONGOING (but thankfully, less obnoxious. The bitches are still coming in off the street wearing character shoes and being forceably outgoing, but they've ceased the warmups... knock on wood...) and I brought her in to see where I'm working today and what I'm doing. We agreed that it looks like I'm in solitary confinement in a mental hospital. A fact made that much clearer when I started to sing "Come To My Window" by Melissa Etheridge. Just call me Juliette Lewis... fuck...

Okay... SO much to talk about and here's hopin' I can get it in before my bosses come back from lunch and shun me off to my cell for the duration of the afternoon...


Let me walk you through my yesterday as it pertains to this situation...

I haul my reluctant-yet-hot ass into work yestermorning where I proceed to work hard for the money and insist that in turn, they better treat me right when all of a sudden I receive a facebook wallpost by one Miss Dini Dimakos expressing her condolences for the departure of Maya Rudolph from SNL.

Knee jerk, me: "Dat bullshit. I've read a press release saying the entire 06-07 cast was back in its entirety." Prompt reply, Dini D: "No. Horrifying truth. Go to Dlisted" (which I do basically every second of the day but for some reason it had eluded me this particular morning). I do. I'm redirected to where they confirm that indeed, Maya has flown the coop. I promptly posted this link on my dear co-fag and co-Maya superfan Anth telling him it's "best he hears this from me".

Me = DEVASTATED. I can't even tell you. I was so forlorn, I actually did work. And I was in a funk the rest o' the livelong day, let me tell ya. Even more devastating is that she'd be departing to join the long, long, LONG list of talented female SNL alumni who have virtually no afterlife following their stint on SNL (I'll be blogging about that exact topic Friday). Honestly, it was like a loved one had died. Terrible.

Flash forward to around 6:45 Post Meridian, I gets a message from dear co-fag Anth saying that the link I posted on his wall did not lead to a story saying that she was leaving but instead a story saying that she was instead staying... Curious... I receive another call from busom bestie Yerxa elatedly-nay-JUBILANTLY proclaiming "She's staying! She's staying!".

And that's all she wrote. Last minute negotiations came through and she decided that in the end "as a mother and as an actress it was the best choice" to stay with the show. A lot of people are taking this as code that "they offered her more money". I happen to think it's the opposite... she wanted more... they wouldn't give it to her, and then she conceded... but that's neither here nor there...

Anyway - I'm basically elated that she's back. Basically. It's a huge shit deal to me and mine. We'll be having a viewing party this weekend when the season premiere hosted by LeBron James and musically guested by Kanye West bows, and it will be festive.

To celebrate Maya's return, and also because I have an edition of "Signature Look" in this blog, let's all enjoy her turn as Tunay Griggs... KALOOH KALAY!


Free speech? Or giving the enemy a no-strings-attached HJ for publicity?

I'm more inclined to agree with the latter...

As you may well have heard by now, Iran's president Mahmoud Ahmadinjad visited the venerable Columbia University on Tuesday in an effort, to, I don't fucking know, bring sexy back to Iran in the eys of the US or something.

No. He addressed Iran's nuclear capacity, didn't address his denial of the holocaust and/or why he wants to obliterate Israel and in what will no doubt go down in the history books, denied homosexuality existing in Iran, claiming, "In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country. We do not have this phenomenon. I don't know who told you that we have it."

Yeah... how was this man allowed to set foot on US soil and not arrested is really the first issue... a lot of people make the analogy that this is like giving Adolph Hitler the podium. The Free Speech enthusiasts assert that it's important to hear his side of things in order to understand.

I'm sorry - there is no other fucking side of things when it comes to radical Islam and a . There is nothing to be empathetic about here - all there is, is a bunch of oppressive, psychotic code that serves an elite few.

A lot of people laugh off his denying the existence of the homosexual 'phenomenon' in Iran as if he's an Ostrich with his head in the sand. Yeah, it's a little more destructive than that. The reason that homosexuality doesn't exist in Iran is because those who are aren't out and those who do 'practice' it are sought out and killed! It's just maddening.

Bottom line is that the line that separates free speech and pure evil is about as fine as a gorilla's pube (read: it's not fine. It's rather thick, distinct and coarse) and this man should have been arrested.

Happier topics...


On the set of the upcoming "Sex & The City" movie where she plays Carrie's assistant, Louise:

Fancy that,

--- Aj