T to the G to the I to the F!
What's happenin' cowboys & Indians... any big plans for the weekend? I'm making my lone yearly visit to Fly tonight for "Madonnarama" - a night of non-stop Madonna music. It's poised to be the faggiest thing that has ever happened in the history of time.
Then Sunday, I'm attending the 100th anniversary of the Royal Alex theatre. There's a rumored who's who of Canadian luminairies expected - chiefly among them, Camilla Scott. I'll make a point to bring my camera.
Three things:
1.) AMY WINEHOUSE IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST ENTERTAINING HUMAN BEING ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET
Everyone's favourite cracked-out British hair-hopping soulstress hit a glorious new low this week - photos circulated of her and husband/drinking buddy Blake Fielder-Civil after what appears to be after a nasty knife-fight.
Apparently he walked in on her about to do herione with a call girl, told her that she 'wasn't good enough for him', she freaked because of this and started cutting herself, he walked in to intervene, got diced six ways to Sunday and in the process, saved her life.
The couple celebrated this by taking their freshly cut wounds on a delightful nightime promenade in merry Londontowne. To the surprise of no one, the papparazzi were present.
There is something about that picture that I find so hilarious. Something about them walking hand in hand, her with her signature bee-hive (does she ever put that shit down?) and 8-tonne mascara eyes freshly collapsed from a crying fit, him looking like he was on the receiving end of a hickey from a moray eel - as if to say "all in a day's work".
Nuts. Gets me in the mood for some classic Winehouse... this clip, introduced to me by Aaron Kyte sometime last winter, marks my introduction to Mz Winehouse... it's her... drunk out of her skull on the Charlotte Church show... singing Michael Jacksons' "Beat It"... and beat it she does... to an agonizing, unethical death...
What's happenin' cowboys & Indians... any big plans for the weekend? I'm making my lone yearly visit to Fly tonight for "Madonnarama" - a night of non-stop Madonna music. It's poised to be the faggiest thing that has ever happened in the history of time.
Then Sunday, I'm attending the 100th anniversary of the Royal Alex theatre. There's a rumored who's who of Canadian luminairies expected - chiefly among them, Camilla Scott. I'll make a point to bring my camera.
Three things:
1.) AMY WINEHOUSE IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST ENTERTAINING HUMAN BEING ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET
Everyone's favourite cracked-out British hair-hopping soulstress hit a glorious new low this week - photos circulated of her and husband/drinking buddy Blake Fielder-Civil after what appears to be after a nasty knife-fight.
Apparently he walked in on her about to do herione with a call girl, told her that she 'wasn't good enough for him', she freaked because of this and started cutting herself, he walked in to intervene, got diced six ways to Sunday and in the process, saved her life.The couple celebrated this by taking their freshly cut wounds on a delightful nightime promenade in merry Londontowne. To the surprise of no one, the papparazzi were present.
There is something about that picture that I find so hilarious. Something about them walking hand in hand, her with her signature bee-hive (does she ever put that shit down?) and 8-tonne mascara eyes freshly collapsed from a crying fit, him looking like he was on the receiving end of a hickey from a moray eel - as if to say "all in a day's work".
Nuts. Gets me in the mood for some classic Winehouse... this clip, introduced to me by Aaron Kyte sometime last winter, marks my introduction to Mz Winehouse... it's her... drunk out of her skull on the Charlotte Church show... singing Michael Jacksons' "Beat It"... and beat it she does... to an agonizing, unethical death...
2.) NICOLE RICHIE IS RELEASED FROM JAIL AFTER SERVING 82 MINUTES
Yep. 82 minutes. 'Overcrowding'.
At least her weigh in was made public.
You'll fucking love this: 5 months pregnant and guess what she tipped the scale at?
105 pounds.
Doesn't that barely qualify her as hale enough to menstuate? I'm shocked she was able to produce an ovum in the first place, quite honestly. Wow.
3.) HOLLYWOOD ELITE SUBPOENAD TO TESTIFY AGAINST CANADA
This is magnificent.
One distinguished Jerome Almon of one very distinguished Murdercap Records has summoned an astounding who's who to appear in court over a lawsuit against the Canadian government that alleges that our customs officials racially profile black rappers at the border and put blame on them for increased gang violence in Toronto and Vancouver.
Subpoena'd: Paris Hilton, Mick Jager, Keith Richards, Snoop Dogg, DMX, P. Diddy, Jenna Jameson, Sunny Leone, Olivia, Jay Z, 50 Cent, Eminem, Alain Jolicoeur, Kobe Bryant, Oprah Winfrey, Katelyn Faber, Spike Lee, Abbe Raven, Tom Sizemore, Beverly Posthill, Martha Stewart, Heidi Fleiss, Belinda Stronach, David Miller, Colin Powell, Condoleeza Rice, and many more. View the subpoenas with y'own damn eyes.
So it's just that easy? File a lawsuit and a smorgasbord of your favourite celebs will be forced to come to y'backyard?
Hmmm... well I think it's safe to say that one Miss Shelley Long will be served with some papers any day now... wink wink wink wink wink...
Gah,
--- Aj
Yep. 82 minutes. 'Overcrowding'.At least her weigh in was made public.
You'll fucking love this: 5 months pregnant and guess what she tipped the scale at?
105 pounds.
Doesn't that barely qualify her as hale enough to menstuate? I'm shocked she was able to produce an ovum in the first place, quite honestly. Wow.
3.) HOLLYWOOD ELITE SUBPOENAD TO TESTIFY AGAINST CANADA
This is magnificent.
One distinguished Jerome Almon of one very distinguished Murdercap Records has summoned an astounding who's who to appear in court over a lawsuit against the Canadian government that alleges that our customs officials racially profile black rappers at the border and put blame on them for increased gang violence in Toronto and Vancouver.
Subpoena'd: Paris Hilton, Mick Jager, Keith Richards, Snoop Dogg, DMX, P. Diddy, Jenna Jameson, Sunny Leone, Olivia, Jay Z, 50 Cent, Eminem, Alain Jolicoeur, Kobe Bryant, Oprah Winfrey, Katelyn Faber, Spike Lee, Abbe Raven, Tom Sizemore, Beverly Posthill, Martha Stewart, Heidi Fleiss, Belinda Stronach, David Miller, Colin Powell, Condoleeza Rice, and many more. View the subpoenas with y'own damn eyes.
So it's just that easy? File a lawsuit and a smorgasbord of your favourite celebs will be forced to come to y'backyard?
Hmmm... well I think it's safe to say that one Miss Shelley Long will be served with some papers any day now... wink wink wink wink wink...
Gah,--- Aj
